Hello there!

It's finally 2018. 

You have no idea how much I crave for the new year to come.

I hated 2017. I mean it.

Unlike most people that I see on the internet, I can never come to a conclusion if I had a good or a bad year when the clock strikes 12 at 31st of every December. 

However, 2017 is the first exception.

It was a year filled with lessons, growth and self-discovery.

I lost some friends but I gained true friendship from there.

Friends that I know who will stand by me when I need them.

Friends that make me feel comfortable being me.

Friends that are honest and always have my best interest in mind.

Friends that will always have my back.

Friends that know who they are when they are reading this.

To those who have let me down,

thank you, really, 'cause I no longer have to waste my time and energy on people like you.

It was such a shame that I thought we could be long term friends but oh well, silly me, to think that you will stand by me.

------

I decided to spend more time with my family after I graduated from polytechnic.

I realised that I didn't spend much time with them when I was still in school.

I didn't know much about them, as in what do they like and dislike, what are they currently going through, how's their life and even something as simple as what is their favourite colour.

I felt ashamed saying this but I really didn't know my family all that well in the past.

I want to be more involved with my family & so I did.

I learned more about my parents, siblings, nieces and nephews.

I understand more about their life, their jobs and some of their struggles.

It makes me feel more 'whole' now that I am closer with my family.

Some of you might wonder, why is it such a big deal for me to be close with them.

You might ask, why can't you just talk to them, what's so difficult about it.

Well, I am the youngest child in my family and I have a huge age gap between my siblings and I.

The age gap ranges from 5 to 12 years.

It means that the closest in age to me is still 5 years older than me.

It wasn't easy for me to communicate with them since they get bored talking to kid like me, and I get annoyed talking to adults like them in the past.

However, now that I am 22 years old, it is easier for me to talk to them as I can share with them more than just my homework assignments but actual social issues and work life experiences that I am currently undergoing.

It actually feels really good to be able to share my personal problems with my family. It feels oddly liberating, at least for me la, 'cause I am not used to sharing my problems with others and even to those that are close to me. So... It's quite freeing imo..

------

I still have so much to share on this platform but it gets a little overwhelming for me to write it all here in one sitting. Just give me some time to untangle all the thoughts that I have in my mind and I promise I will be more eloquent next time.

さようなら ♥